A lonely bee

a view from Everton Hall, Wellington

a view from Everton Hall, Wellington

summer is nice

summer is fun

when you got friends.. that is

I do not consider myself as not having friends at all.  I have a lot of friends. I’m one of the rare species in Wellington that actually have broad connections although i’m just here for a year. If i were to be compared with my seniors, who probably have been here for 2 or 3 years longer than me, i might surpass their networks.My connections varies ..students, working Malaysians, families, businessmen, diplomats.. to name a few.

Back when I was in primary school, i told my mum that i had lunch with a friend in my own study group. My mum replied ” do not aggroup. Befriends with everyone and do not stick to your own cycles “. I grew up remembering her words and make well connections with others. But of course, wherever i go there will be a few of friends that i may consider as my close friends. We share our stories and had fun together. But i never attach myself too closely to any group. I befriended to people, because i trust them personally. Not because they are the so-called Pretty gangs or Cool gangs or whatever they want to call their group.

From time to time, people would also see me walks alone. Moving independently wherever I want to go and do anything as I please. and some might say that I do not actually have friends, just because i did not join any gangs that they could possibly imagine.  The truth is, my parents had gave me such freedom and trust since i entered hostel by the age of 13. I was pretty glad with that trust and hence i built up my own confidence based on that.

One year ago,  i came to Wellington with another 6 friends of the same scholarship scheme.  All of my other friends went to Auckland. Only 7 of us who really wish to try something new (by new, it means that we’re the first batch ever to be sent here) came to Wellington. We made friends with the existing students and even locals. I’d say that we’re also quite independent in whatever we do. Be it study, clubs or work. all of us move independently but yet, we stay close and cares for each other. These are the people that i’ve seen to share almost the same social habit as i am. i’m very pleased to befriend with them.

and here comes the summer..also, the challenge.

All of them have gone back to Malaysia for Summer holiday already and i’m here, studying for my summer course. Aside them, there were bunch of my friends went back for good as well (and 5 of them are my closest friends)  Very very few of my close friends are here (note that by close, my social networks are off the story). I made some new friends during my time here, but not as many as last summer. Most probably because i was pushed to this end by my ONLINE course which requires me to stay inside of my room most of the time and yes, i’m still busy with my clubs affairs although it’s summer already. Simply put, I’m busy.

I love wellington. There’s so much that could be done in summer actually.but i’m busy. what a lame excuse for not enjoying my time here. I’m not that boring, for all i know i still have few things in mind to make up my boredom. But i’m terribly lonely.

I may have a lot of friends,contacts,networks..whatever u wish to call it. but not that many that could fill my needs, to cure my loneliness. Some good friends of mine here  were quite busy themselves. with their works and all. i understand very well that they couldn’t hang out with me all the time, because i’m also a busy bee.

I’m not bored

For i have a lot to do

But i’m lonely.. just lonely..

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~ by littlehobbit on December 22, 2008.

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