A positive distraction

•June 29, 2017 • Leave a Comment

I may have had relationships and also almost relationships before but I never feel as consumed like now.

My relationship now is unlabelled. “Friends with benefit”? – too harsh and an understatement for my feelings.”In a relationship”? – he never acknowledge me as his girlfriend no matter how I teased him to. He’s way too specific not to commit to such labels.

Still, one thing I know. I’ve always made my feelings known and I’ll give him anything within my means to support him. Including his debt. Yes, debt.

I was reluctant at first but love overwhelms many things. I want him to stabilise himself as soon as possible so we could think about us. No more solely his dream or mine , but our dream. I want us to plan and build our future together.

Nonetheless, his focus is definitely on his work and debt. Me? I was so focus on wanting him that I stopped building myself. I missed him so much and spent so much time trying to figure out how he’s doing, who he’s meeting, how deep his love for me etc. My thought revolves around him. It wasn’t intentional. I was deep in adaptation problem at work too.

I transfered to another workplace. We’re divided by a vast ocean. Keeping an “unlabelled relationship” is a daunting task. Managing changes at work is taxing. My only relief is him. He keeps a pleasant relationship but we didn’t go deep. Mostly, he couldn’t afford to.

I’m trying my best to enjoy the moment now. Marriage is far from my destiny no matter how much I want it.

I bickered with him twice. One was  out of my jealousy. Second was out of his frustrations at work and he could no longer lent his ear for my problem at work. However, I spun the second situation as an eye opener.

I shall tackle my own problem. He’s not my boyfriend so he’s not obliged to listen to my whines. I fell for him and I’ll continue loving him. I’ll support him but I must build myself. It’s time to recreate the best version of me.

I need to be more confident and independent. I may found happiness in him but it shall not be the only way. I need to be positive about this change. I need to believe in God more. If it’s meant to be, it is. We fight for what matters and it’s not solely the relationship.

I need to :

1) read more

2) write more

3) learn something new

4) finish my work with the best quality

5) get fit

I give myself 20 weeks transformation! Here it goes!



Does being a parent make you a better teacher?

•March 17, 2016 • Leave a Comment

memorizing alif lam mim

•February 1, 2016 • Leave a Comment

Author Solutions and Friends: The Inside Story

•December 16, 2015 • Leave a Comment

Have I just fell into a scam? Darn it.

David Gaughran

ASandfriendsweboptAuthor Solutions has forged partnerships with a long list of famous names in publishing – from Simon & Schuster and Hay House to Barnes & Noble and Reader’s Digest.

Recent disclosures in various lawsuits, along with information sent to me by a Penguin Random House source, detail for the very first time exactly how these partnerships work and the damage they are causing.

Since a second suit was filed at the end of March, Author Solutions is now facing two class actions, with the new complaint alleging unjust enrichment and exploitation of seniors on top of the usual claims of fraud and deceptive practices. It also has a wonderfully precise summary of Author Solutions’ operations:

Author Solutions operates more like a telemarketing company whose customer base is the Authors themselves. In other words, unlike a traditional publisher, Author Solutions makes money from its Authors, not for them. It does so…

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5 Techniques to Improve Your Luck

•May 16, 2015 • Leave a Comment

I feel like I am indeed one lucky woman!


It isn’t enough to be good. You need luck.

We tend to think that smart people make good decisions and stupid people make bad decisions and that luck plays very little role. That is until we’re one of those smart people who has a bad outcome because of luck.

You can’t ignore luck and you really can’t plan for it. Yet much of life is the combination, to varying degrees, of skill and luck. This continuum is also what makes watching sports fun. The most talented team doesn’t always win, luck plays a role.

However elusive, luck is something that we can cultivate. While we can’t control it, we can improve it. In How to Get Lucky: 13 techniques for discovering and taking advantage of life’s good breaks, Max Gunther shows us how.

It turns out that lucky people characteristically organize their lives in such a way that they…

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New Spirit

•November 9, 2014 • Leave a Comment

I have found the person.

The muse.

The igniter of my fire

He may dismiss me as normal friend in the end

I have to be prepared

Let the time reveal our fate

5 Things You Should Be Doing to Have an Insanely Productive Week

•October 22, 2014 • Leave a Comment


This article originally appeared on Entrepreneur.com.

A productive week depends largely on what you focus on every working day and how much time you allocate to activities that take up your time (i.e. busy work). Working harder does not necessarily mean you are being productive. There will always be a better way to complete that task. Find it, work smarter and get more done in your working week.

These are a few things can do to have an insanely productive week this and every other week.

1. Stop planning, start doing.

It’s okay to make time to plan what needs to be done in the week or month but when you get back to the planning table often, you lose precious productive hours.

So instead of plan, just do it. The option to work on a task in the future instead of now seem comfortable but not prudent. While…

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